Kentucky Stapler Gets Stolen from Office for an Epic Road Trip

Sep 02, 2023

Candace Cleveland works as an Administrative Assistant for Townsquare Media's Owensboro, Kentucky office, where she is incredibly protective of her favorite stapler. As you can see, she's even taped a "Do Not Remove Front Desk (Receptionist)" label to it. Not only has Candace marked her territory with that label, she also hoards that stapler in one of her desk drawers next to a tape dispenser with the same exact label.

Enter Candace's coworker Heather Terry (pictured below on the left), who is incessantly borrowing that stapler and forgetting to return it. It's difficult to even count the number of times Heather's made Candace mad by doing it, but that hasn't phased Heather at all. She and another coworker- her BFF and work wife Brooklyn Maple- recently headed south on a short road-trip vacation and they abducted Candace's stapler before they rolled out of work and town.

Candace wasn't aware that her beloved office supply went on the unexpected adventure of a lifetime.

Here are some hilarious photos and action shots from its trip! Think Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure. But, in this case, Bill and Ted brought their stapler.

Now, here's the funny thing. Candace didn't even realize her favorite, protected-like-Fort-Knox stapler was even missing when Heather and Brooklyn were out of the office. While Candace may not have noticed the stapler's disappearance this time, it has been a frequently noticed pattern of behavior in the past. That's precisely why she has created the Noah's Ark of office supplies in the radio station lobby.

As Candace says, "I've put two of everything up front. Why does anyone need to borrow mine??"

Heather will tell you why! "Because Candace hides the good one!"

Well, the 'good one' is now an office legend. If the other staplers thought it was special before, they're really failing to measure up to "Do Not Remove Front Desk (Receptionist)" now.